Like most midwestern groups, our parties are in private homes, so we need to meet you before inviting you to one of our host’s houses! In Minky, we sometimes refer to this as a “vibe check” or just “meeting a mod.” We aren’t expecting a list of your references and a copy of your kinky resume! Meeting a mod for “vibe check” is how you become a Minky Member!

The links to RSVP to our parties are on our discord ( and require becoming a Minky Member by meeting a mod.

Minky also frequently hosts special members events! These non-party, non-munch events are sometimes vanilla non-kink events, while others may include some kink play or demos. These events are for Minky Members only, so you’ll also need to have met a mod!

You can meet a mod in two ways for Minky–Digital hangouts, and at our monthly munches on the last Sunday of the month!

Note: This is not related at all to being age verified on our discord–all that does is allow you to access certain channels in that space.

To meet a mod at a munch:

  • We have munches on the last Sunday of each month.
  • We announce munch location and time here on the website, on our discord, and on fetlife.
  • Come to the munch! Our munches are low pressure, low structure, and don’t feature things such as everyone attending doing introductions. Mods will make themselves known, and we also tend to make an extra effort to say hello and chat with people we don’t recognize!
  • Eat delicious things and engage in conversation!

To meet a mod digitally:

  • Join our discord!
  • We have digital hangouts usually at least once a month. These are very lowkey social events on video chat talking about topics kinky or otherwise! These are posted and announced on the discord.
  • If you tell us that you’re looking to attend a digital event because you cannot make it to one of our munches, we’ll do our best to take those requests into account when scheduling these digital events to be sure that we’re having enough of them and that you can attend! However, we typically will not have one the same week of a party.
  • Until then, stick around, chat, get ID’d! You must be Age Verified to be able to access the voice / video channels, which is where do do the hangouts! See the #verification channel on our discord.

To RSVP to parties and attend members-only events:

  • Once you’ve met a mod and “passed the vibe check,” you’re a Minky Member! This is also a role you’ll get added in our discord ( You’ll find the RSVP links for our parties on the discord!
  • You are also now able to attend other members-only events that we host! You’ll find these in the events tab of the discord, and in the #minky-events channel. Many of these events are “public” to all Minky Members and the location will be in the channel, while some events have limited attendance and require RSVP by a form.
  • We encourage everyone to join the discord ( It’s a great way to stay in touch with people you meet at our events! And, we add each month’s party invite list to a special category deleted after the party to be able to chat about things like party scene planning and potluck food planning!
  • However, if you do not have a discord account and are unable to make one, you may message a moderator after you’re a Minky Member and we will send you the RSVP link.
  • Invitations with party location and information are sent about 48 hours before the party.